This morning I lied in bed and held Gregorie's hand. Yes, still wonderfully plump and super soft. A baby hand. I don't know why this surprised me.
I remember, very clearly, one night when I lied down with them and held one hand in each of mine. And Greggie's was of course a baby hand. And Alex's just wasn't. The palm was leathered. The back was soft, but not baby soft. The whole thing just wasn't fleshy. I remember so distinctly lying there, thinking, "Oh, my gosh, when did she GROW UP???? When did she stop being my baby????" So, this morning, when I held Greggie's hand and it was still a baby hand, I was so relieved! I know that when I felt Alex's grown up hand she had to be older than Greggie is now. But still, I'll rue the day when that soft fleshy paw is mine no more.
Why does the passing time hurt so much some times??????